Don’t get too comfortable with your Spring 2002 course schedules just yet, LSU students.  LSU’s Course Management Department, along with the Assistant Dean of Scheduling, has been hard at work over the Christmas break to bring you an invigorating lineup of new courses. 

The following ten courses can be scheduled (if available) by calling REGGIE, entering your personal information, pressing # at the third menu, and then simultaneously pressing *, 9, and 3.  Wait fifteen minutes, connect to the internet, direct your browser to PAWS, and transfer the information from the phone, to your scheduling book, and finally to PAWS.

1. CSA 1101: Course Scheduling Assistance (3.0 credits)

[NOT OFFERED]  May be taken for a max. of 9 hrs. of credit.  In-depth lecture series offering fun tips for quick scheduling.  Covers difficulties with transferring information between phones, scheduling books, and PAWS.

2. TG 2734: Tailgating Values (1.0 credits)

      Proper etiquette for tailgating at LSU Football games.  Basic principles of color-coordinating family members’ apparel, synchronizing hand gestures to LSU Band music, and planning out expensive trips just to watch football games.

3. HIST 8792: History of Television Shows 2 (7.0 credits)

Prereq. HIST 8791.  Continued studies in semi-popular TV shows running from 1987 to the present.  Mentions, but doesn’t fully cover ALF, Full House, or Saved by the Bell: The College Years.  May sub. for ENG 2000 or CHEM 2261.

4. KIN 3672: Gymboree (0.5 credits)

      Tuck & tumbling, unidentifiable rashes, general silly activities in the gym, and various uncomfortable and/or useless exercises to perform in leotards.  25-page term paper due every six weeks.

5. REL 1766: Tacky Religious Holiday Decoration (5.0 credits)

      Mechanics and principles of decorating dwellings with cheap, bulk-produced ornaments and knick-knacks.  Focuses mainly on Christmas, though all traditional American holidays will be discussed.

6. HEED 0075: Appl. in Teddy Bear Stuffing (4.0 credits)

      2hrs. lecture, 2 hrs. studio.  Teaches correct cotton stuffing techniques useful in creating delightfully soft teddy bears.  Students provided with cotton and 2 pre-stuffed teddy bears.

7. ENG 5995: Danielle Steele Classics (3.0 credits)

Prereq.: ENG 2148 & ENG 4148.  Identifying romantic novel cover art; ignoring tired, repetitive plots; and believing that all true romances involve handsome gardeners, jealous husbands, and conniving best friends.

8. COMD 3803: Making Sense of Nonsense (Blue credits)

Prereq.: CSA 1101.  Spoon fragrance, flickable dipsnaps, losing unwashed face, deaf blind mute grundles, and sippity grandmother fishbait.  May sub. for ZX-1097 or Sammy.

9. HTDL 1002: How to do LSU Part 2 (2.0 credits)

      Prereq.: HTDL 1001.  Restructured course that helps incoming students find their way around LSU.  Completely contradicts everything taught in HTDL 1001.  Taught at Kenmore High School.  Night classes only.

10. HORT 2773: Pretending to Understand Horticulture (3.0 credits)

      Using horticulture, creating horticulture, advanced horticultural design, and learning to play the horticulture on the banjo.  Field trip to Horticulture Land required.

           Any complaints about the above courses can be directed to the Assistant Dean of Scheduling, who can be reached 24-hours a day, 7 days a week, through the LSU website.