Last summer, LSU’s Athletic Department announced that it had “a treat
in store for all or a few LSU students.” This treat, which turned out
to be not much of a treat at all, was a new logo for the university’s
football team, which is named the LSU Tigers. Now, the same department
that recreated the university’s logo is trying to get a refund for it.
Instead of using any of the university’s talented student artists or
graphic designers (many of whom would love to have their work
recognized and appreciated with little compensation), LSU officials
agreed that the best route was to contract an expensive private
advertising firm to design the logo. Almost all of the officials
regret making that decision.
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Above: The best
logo that anyone could ever conceive to be printed on LSU's merchandise and
uniforms. |
“I would have killed for a chance to design that logo. By saying that
I mean I would have brutally murdered one of my fellow human beings
just to have my name on that logo,” said graphic design senior Amy
Fruttlesty. “You know what, I think I’m going to kill someone right
now.”
Officials claim that when LSU began its search for the perfect graphic
design firm, LSU Contract Negotiator Albert Sappsy made approximately
one phone call to an agency in New York, The Sacku Design Company.
After having a short conversation about the weather and being put on
hold for a minute, Sappsy immediately offered the contract to Sacku
Design.
Sappsy then embarked on an expensive trip to New York City (without
permission from his supervisors) and delivered the university’s
deposit money ($25,000) and preliminary logo concepts (a tiger and the
letters ‘LSU’) to Sacku Design, a mission that could have easily been
accomplished with one simple e-mail. For the next six days, Sappsy
treated himself to a fantastic tour of the city with his seemingly
limitless supply of LSU funds.
Sappsy’s adventures included stops at the Figurine of Liberty, the
Dodger Stadium Hot Dog Booth, Central Square Park, and the Empire
Steak Building’s Gift Shop. When he returned to work, he was promptly
fired and banned from ever stepping foot on LSU soil again.
However, back in New York, Sacku Design had already begun
halfheartedly working on the new logo, and LSU had no choice but to
fork over the remaining $75,000 that Sappsy had promised the company.
After two full days of fashioning the logo, Sacku Design shipped out
the finished product, a picture of a “vicious-looking” tiger on top of
the traditional letters “LSU.” Authorities pretended to be pleased
with the logo, and when they unveiled it in August, no one was
impressed, a few fans were confused, and everyone was angry.
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Above: The current
leader in the LSU Logo Contest. In a few years, this could replace the current
shitty logo. |
Months
later, the Athletic Department vainly tried to redeem itself by
declaring that in addition to the football team, all of the
university’s other barely-appreciated sports teams would also be
required to display the new logo on their uniforms, helmets, and
supportive undergarments. In addition, the logo has been printed on
thousands of t-shirts, gym bags, baby mittens, postage stamps,
toothbrushes, birthday cakes, condoms, and pencil cases.
Overall, the new LSU logo has been embarrassingly unsuccessful and the
university is reportedly in major debt as a result of its massive
production costs. In order to rectify the situation, officials say
will soon try mailing the logo back to Sacku Design in exchange for
the $100,000 spent on the logo. Also, all remaining merchandise with
the logo printed on it will be burned and anyone caught wearing
something with the logo on it will be heavily fined and imprisoned.
Beginning next month, LSU will host a logo-drawing contest, which will
be open to all sons and daughters of LSU faculty who are under the age
of 5. The entrant who provides the winning logo will receive $99,000
and their picture on the Reveille’s website, which is visited
several times a day by every Reveille employee. The old LSU
logo will be dusted off and used as a temporary replacement until the
contest’s winning entry is determined. The contest will run until the
year 2007.
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