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Aaron Carter and Lil’ Bow Wow to Head Groovin’ on the Grounds 

     LSU students are reeling from the announcement this week that Aaron Carter and Lil’ Bow Wow will be the headlining acts of the 2002 Groovin’ on the Grounds.  The absolutely free concert is set to take place on the LSU Parade Grounds on April 12. 
Above: Carter jamming his little heart and penis off at one of his nerdy concerts.

     Aaron Carter, the lovable 12-year old younger brother of Backstreet Boy Nick Carter, has crooned his way into the hearts of millions with poignant hits such as “Aaron’s Party,” “How I beat Shaq,” and the timeless remake of “I Want Candy.”

     Lil’ Bow Wow, a 10-year old, sort of miniaturized version of rap legend Snoop Doggy Dogg, will surely treat LSU students with some fancy dance moves and a few of his smooth hip-hop numbers like “Bounce wit’ Me,” “Roll wit’ Me,” or his most popular hit, “Hang wit’ Me.”

     LSU Students on Target, the organizer of Groovin’ on the Grounds every year, says that the artist selection process was difficult at first.

     “It ended up being a simple financial decision.  We could afford to either get only a couple of big name bands or a bunch of lesser known bands.  When we found out that Aaron and LBW would pay us to have them play here, we made our choice right away,” said SOT media spokesperson, Kimberly Fisher.

     Of course, this too-good-to-be-true performance has to come at some price, namely the fact that advertisers are hoping to bring to campus a crowd that will consist mostly of screaming 8- to13-year old girls and a few creepy, middle-aged men.

Above: Lil Bow Wow performing in front of a bunch of suckers.

     Also, managers for the two talented youngsters have clearly outlined that the concert must conclude before sundown, meaning Grooving on the Grounds will have a much earlier start this year – early enough to conflict with classes.

     Preliminary plans call for Aaron Carter to begin rocking the stage to its very foundations somewhere around 2 PM.  After he leaves the stage at 4 PM, Lil’ Bow Wow will unleash his fellow ‘doggs’ to fill the campus with funky, fresh beats until 6:30.

     Fans of the dazzling young singers are remaining hopeful about the rumors of a special surprise duet song being written exclusively for the LSU concert, however, management refused to confirm anything.

     “Aaron Carter and Lil’ Bow Wow onstage at the same time?  Oh my god, they are so hot,” squealed Lindsey Simmons, a local second-grader at Lee Elementary.

     “They may as well have Sesame Street dancing around up on the stage, man,” Paul Freeley, architecture junior, commented.  “At least that way, when my parents bring my little sister to Groovin’ on the Grounds, she’d maybe learn something.”

     Students on Target also wants students to know that Seattle-based grunge band, Pearl Jam, will be the opening act for Mr. Carter and Mr. Wow.


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