Studio 8's Valentine's Day Tips #2

     While at dinner, ask your mate if he or she has ever been to a live NASCAR event. If they haven't, tell them how cool it is (or don't) then wait until they fall asleep. Before they hit the 3rd stage of deep sleep, whisk them away in a rental van to the nearest race track and just wait for a race to start. On the way up there, play old tapes on the rental vans VCR. If there is no VCR, play audio tapes. If there is no stereo system, make little vroom vroom noises with your mouth for as long as possible.

     Shave the head of your penis down to an even stump. Freeze the blood until next Valentine's Day. Then think of something to do with it.

     Think about giving your special someone a rim job, opting instead to fall sleep with your lips still touching the colon.

     Think about past lovers of yours, and keep thinking about them while telling your current lover how much you like or love them.
    
     Surprise your spouse with a brand new waterbed, filled with champagne. In the middle of the night, go sleep on the sofa, explaining to your spouse that he or she makes you sick to your stomach. If you can, vomit around the house a little bit.

      Learn how to play a really romantic song on a guitar but refuse to play it in front of anyone. Get very angry whenever anyone asks you about this.

      Be a cutie-patooty.

      Do whatever it takes to give your lover the most explosive orgasm ever. Afterwards, break up.

Related Items:

- Studio 8's Ready-Made Printable Love Letters

- Old Tips

- More Holiday Fun